spontaneous cider :when good fruit goes bad

I admit it. I'm a little skittish about home brewing. While I'm a good cook I'm kind of bad at following orders (um I meant recipes). I am also not punctilious about the state of my dishes. I was also raised by a woman who was the kind of teetotaler who is uncomfortable with using alcohol based extracts in high temperature baking. Add to this the exploded beer atrocity of 1998, the scary bottles of dandelion wine no doubt still lurking in the basement I haven't seen in a decade and the ubiquitous horribleness of my first sourdough starter (since rectified) and I've gotten almost silly about it. These factors have led to things like making slow fermented sauerkraut in the fridge rather than risking fermentation in the warmer (no doubt) faster climes of my cupboards. Meanwhile I envy the glowing jewels of mead, beer and lately other wines that arrive periodically at my house courtesy of benevolent friends.

My favorite alcohols are cider, bourbon and mead- in that order. I'll also admit a fondness for gluhwein. Witbiers used to also be on that list but then I found out I'm not supposed to eat wheat. Unless I research, cider is safer out and about. I still get a mood for the occasional oatmeal stout. Beer is tasty but frankly cider is even better. Plus, no risk. In the plains I mostly had a choice between Hornsby's and Woodchuck. When we moved to Chicago I discovered two things. 1. Alcohol is really really expensive here....like 8$ for a six of the cheapest frankly not very tasty cider I can find in these parts. 2. cider is everywhere and for some reason bourbon is 2x the price it was in Kansas. 3.The apples here are awesome.. I had forgotten.

Now, I can spend 10$ on 22 oz of a fabulous organic sweet cider from Michigan (JK Scrumpy) or an extra 2$ on a six pack of Original Sin or Wyder's. Given that it still takes me weeks to finish that sixer I was ok with that.

One hot late summer day this year I grabbed a half gallon of cider along with some tofu and the peck of apples from our csa. A few hours later I deposited our purchases in the fridge and thought nothing of it. The next am I went to grab a glass of juice and noticed that the cider was carbonated though not yet funny smelling. I looked up some stuff online which said it was fine to drink but thought that maybe I should wait a day or two to see what developed. I checked and stirred it daily to release the gases building up on the plastic walls of the cider jug. Three days later it smelled and tasted like the 10$ per 22 oz product including the ridiculously high alcohol volume and stayed that way for about 5 days by which time it was gone. It makes sense, wild yeast here can't be too different from Michigan and the cider was a preservative free Organic Michigan apple cider (cost 5$ for the half gallon: a bit of a splurge). So now with our CSA Thanksgiving share of 2 gallons of cider I was wondering. how we could fit two jugs of cider in the fridge. It came to me...I could see if I could make it into hard cider was as easy as it appeared.

The day of the share arrival I poured 1 gallon of fresh apple cider -a mixed apple variety from our csa with no preservatives (or it won't ferment) into a 1 gallon sterile carboy (old Rossi jug) and covered with a bit of clean fabric secured with a rubber band. The next day I stirred the mixture (not bubbling yet as it's late November and it's chilly cause we're cheapskates) and added 2 oz Wyder's dry apple cider (because that's what's around and again, it wasn't bubbling yet).

Day Two. rotated and stirred to aerate as I a read blog that said this was important

- apparently. Makes sense, the yeast need to breathe. Mixture appears quite fizzy and tastes like apple soda. To taste this I poured off an ounce or so.

Day Three

The cider appears full on cider-ish, it smells sweet and a touch skunky at first. Keep in mind it took me a minute to smell this and I have quite the sniffing abilities. After allowing it to breathe a few minutes while I googled the possible dangers of skunky cider the eggy smell had evaporated. Now it smells sweet and appley. Mixture tastes like a nice honey sweet cider with a light kick and a mild sour bite. Drank half a glass. So far not ill. Aerated remainder and left on counter. I will let you know what happens on day 4 and beyond.

Warnings: 1. Don't be an idiot with alcohol. Drinking with kids (inside or outside of you) and operating machinery like cars, cell phones (in some cases) or drills is not only hazardous to your health but it's likely to get you arrested or killed. Drinking with idiots is likewise inadvisable. Please, just don't.

2. This is clearly an experiment. Like mushroom hunting you probably shouldn't do this without an expert on hand, decent equipment, testing strips and possibly a cold cellar. I AM NOT AN EXPERT. This might be dangerous, or lethal. I don't know. Research safer methods, ok?

3. Being an experiment, I'm not sure how this will turn out. I'll let you know.

I still venture that this was dangerous...and tasty.
While storing in fridge day 4-10  I rotated the bottle regularly . The sweet bubbly stuff had more of a kick and got gradually drier,and less skunky .
We drank about 1/2 of it before it started smelling like vinegar (no gas resistant bottles around) around day 10. At this point we just opened it up and rotated it daily to allow the gases out. On day 30 it had separated clearly into vinegar and mother of V. We strained and rebottled for use in salads and as hair rinse.
 

cleaner recipes : counter/floor spray, furniture polish, scrubbing stuff... I don't eat this

spray bottle
1 cup water
1 cup cheap vodka
3 tb vinegar
1/4 c liquid soap(castile,flax based or non petroleum based dish detergent)
10-15 drops essential oil for summer in damp mosquito-y Chicago I use lemongrass (can repel many small bugs), and tangerine because it makes me happy

to make
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mix together by pouring in bottle and shaking a few times
label
shake before use
keep away from kids/pets in cool location

spray on surface,wipe,alcohol kills some bacteria soap. some kills some.leaves pretty smell by evaporation.if serving/ preparing food on surface use follow with a wet cloth to remove soap residue. Not for wood surfaces as the alcohol will destroy most shellac, poly coatings and damage wood. To clean wood surfaces wash with soap and water and follow with furniture polish.


Furniture polish for unpainted surfaces

Ingredients
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mix 2 oz olive oil and 2 oz lemon juice
add 4-5 drops citrus essential oil (grapefruit,lemon,tangerine,etc)
4-5 oz empty bottle

to make
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pour into bottle and shake

to use
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label and refrigerate between uses

15 minutes before use take out for fat to thaw
shake well
apply small quantity with soft cloth (circular motion helps)
keep away from kids/pets
do not use on floors as this will make your floor dangerously slippery

scrubbing stuff for tile,stainless steel, enamel,etc
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clean empty 20 oz squirt bottle (the kind dish soap comes in)
4 oz liquid soap(castille , non petroleum dish soap)
4 oz baking soda
4 oz vinegar
essential oil of your choice
2-3 oz water
mixing bowl/ and funnel
fork

to make
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1.using fork thoroughly mix soap, baking soda and essential oil in bowl
2.add water, then vinegar -some fizzing should occur,mix gently with fork
3. pour into squirt bottle using funnel,label
keep away from kids/pets

red lentil stew and creamy coconut curry stew upgrade

Ingredients

8 oz red lentils (can also use yellow split peas in this recipe)
paprika (sweet)
Onion
5 cloves garlic
1/4 cup lemon juice. (fresh if you can but not imperative)
6 cups veggie broth ,chicken stock or 6 cups water plus 2 cubes vegetarian chicken flavor boullion (I like the rapunzel no salt) 2 tb Harissa(if you can't find it sri racha or gochu chang works well instead, In a pinch Lousiana hotsauce will do)

optional add ins: dill, 2 carrots, a potato, a red or orange pepper) 2 handfuls fresh spinach, a handful of barley or kasha, parsley, salt
freezer containers (recipe easily doubles)


1.Put one half bag (8 oz) red lentils in a medium 6 qt pot and add 6 cups water(or chicken stock). Check for stones or rotten beans. If anything floats to the top pick it out and use new water. If using kasha or barley add it now.
Turn heat on high.

2. chop one large onion saute until translucent in two TB olive oil . add one tb whole cumin to the oil and 1 tsp paprika.
3. add 5 cloves or more sliced garlic and saute for 1 more minute (if you add the garlic in at the same time as they onions they will burn and ruin your soup.)
3. Add one two chopped carrots or chopped potatoes if desired
4. grind cumin over lentils 15 times (or add 1 tb ground cumin). Stir the lentils every few minutes as you do this.
5. add onions, garlic, spices to lentils
6. after about 20 minutes add broth cubes if you used water or add at beginning on low for crock pot

7. add 2 cups water and reduce heat to medium. now go do something else in the kitchen for about ten minutes.
8. add lemon juice and stir. If lentils are falling apart taste. if not wait ten more minutes.
9. Adjust salt ,lemon, olive oil, and cumin to your taste
11. If using dill add 1 small handful chopped fronds (skip it if you can't get fresh or frozen)
or 2 handfuls chiffonaded spinach (you could use chard or kale here if you wanted but then add it when you add the lemon)
12. Simmer until blended. about 5 minutes
13.Garnish with thin lemon slices and or parsley if desired

Ok so let's say you've been eating on this for a week because you quadrupled the recipe because it's finals week (or you have doubleshifts )or you don't feel like cooking. You're sick of it.There's no room in the freezer. Well it turns into other stuff pretty easily
Let's say you want:
Curried coconut lentil soup (good hot or chilled)
and you have
4 cups of red lentil stew
1/2 can of whole coconut milk (12 oz) or 4 oz unsweetened coconut cream(half a small tetra pack)
2 tb curry paste (any kind but I think green works best here) or 3 tb good curry powder
and optionally some leftover roasted tofu (or grilled chicken breast or cooked shrimp) and maybe some cilantro


There are two methods for step one:
If you are lazy and/or hot and have a blender
put cooled stew , curry and and coconut milk (and cilantro if using) in blender and pulse until smooth.

Stove top (it's going to be chunkier unless you blend it too)
Add all ingredients and stir in a pot until blended even if you want to serve it chilled so the flavors can marry

Step Two:
Heat or chill and pour into bowls. Garnish with tofu, or shrimp
or chicken if desired. If you used cilantro garnish with a little as a warning to cilantro haters.

Step 3: In the extremely unlikely event of leftovers serve heated over steamed rice (white or brown) along side a salad or some pickled veggies

super easy macaroons and even easier macaroons

Mix together
2 cup coconut flakes
½ cup sugar
2 egg whites
¼ tsp salt or vanilla salt
1 tsp almond extract or 1tsp vanilla extract
1 tb  shortening
chill for ½ hr

pre heat oven to 325 F degrees

line a cookie sheet with parchment

drop 1 tb per cookie on cookie sheet

Bake 25 minutes until golden
allow to cool at least 5 minutes before eating
store in airtight container

Even easier vegan macaroons
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Mash 1 overripe banana until pudding textured.
add a pinch of salt and 2cups coconut flakes. Mix well.

pre heat oven to 325 F degrees

line a cookie sheet with parchment

drop 1 tb per cookie on cookie sheet

Bake 25 minutes until golden as your dwelling becomes banana scented
allow to cool at least 5 minutes before eating
store in airtight container.

universal pesto (vegan or cheesy) gf, cf

a blender or food processor
1 lg handful (1/2 ish) nuts or large seeds
1 0z aged cheese (or 1/2 oz tahini and 1 TB dry mustard)
1-2 oz herbs/aromatic greens
pinch salt and maybe pepper
2-4 cloves garlic
1 oz olive oil
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Tonight I have crinkled cress and nasturtium leaves from our garden getting a bit wilty. If I had them and wanted this a touch spicier I could add radish leaves. If I wanted it mellower I could use spinach or chard. I could also use cilantro.
I will add 3 cloves garlic

and 1 oz cheddar (which I buy in bulk) and walnuts (which are yummy and sitting around)with salt pepper and olive oil. I will blend this until it's mostly uniform.

flexible spiced cider and wine

1/2 gallon apple cider
plus 1 can apple juice (2 qts water)

or 1 gallon apple  cider

optional 1 cup orange juice
optional 1 bottle white wine or mixture of several white wines
optional 1 bottle mead
optional 1 cup honey liquer
optional 1 cup rum
optional 1 cup brandy
optional 1 bottle red wine
optional 1/4 cup honey
(last time I used 1/2 c OJ, 2/3 bottle dry white wine, 1/3 bottle mead,1 cup honey vodka and 1/2 cup rum with 1 1/2 gallons of apple juice/cider mix)

Spices
5 peppercorns
1 tsp whole cardamom or 1/2 tsp ground
2 cinnamon sticks
4 cloves
zest of one orange
1/2 chunk of ginger diced
1 peeled orange sliced
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 cup currants or raisins
Throw everything you want in a crockpot except liquors. Make sure lid is on. Put on High setting.
When everything is hot after 1 -2 hours add liquor and reduce heat to 'keep warm'. Make sure lid stays on when not serving. Make sure everyone drinks responsibly.

easy dosas (vegan, gluten/wheat free)

2 tb minced onion
sm handful cilantro (if on hand) chopped fine
1/2 tsp garam masala
1 tb cumin whole or half whole and 1/2 ground
salt to taste
1 cup chickpea flour(might be labeled as chenna, or garbanzo flour)
1/4 tsp paprika (if on hand)
up to 2 1/2 cups water
oil or butter
Mix all dry ingredients in a bowl, cilantro and onion
Slowly mix in water a bit at a time using a fork or whisk until the texture of crepe batter.
Pre heat skillet and lightly oil. Use 1/2 cup measure to ladle batter onto pan. Lift pan and rotate to spread batter (same as you would with a crepe). Allow to set until bubbles appear and firm up. Flip at this point. Roll and stack on plate to retain heat when done. Repeat until batter is done.
Serve with veg, bhaji, greens, fruit, pickles, scrambled eggs,or whatever or serve with soup or yogurt. Traditionally this is a breakfast or snack dish. These refrigerate up to a week.